There’s No Way Rick Santorum and Maggie Gallagher Will Attend Your Gay Wedding

Over the years, we’ve seen just about every anti-gay activist say “I have gay friends.” But, don’t count on your anti-gay activist “friends” to attend your very gay wedding.

First, Frothy Mix (Rick Santorum) has no intentions of attending:

The former Senator for Pennsylvania, who is widely expected to run for president again, was asked by radio host Hugh Hewitt if he would “attend a same-sex wedding of a loved one or a family friend or anyone you were close to?”

Mr Santorum replied: “No I would not.”

Asked why, he struggled to answer for a moment before saying: “As a person of my faith, that would be something that would be a violation of my faith.

“I would love them and support them but I would not participate in that ceremony.”

Shit. Who is going to be my bridesmaid now, Maggie Gallagher perhaps? And isn’t Frothy running for President for like the 12th time?

Nope – sausage-fingered Maggie Gallagher, who founded the anti-gay NOM, also won’t attend:

So I would sit down with my friend and tell them this:

Here’s what I think. We are born male and female, and marriage is the union of husband to wife that celebrates the necessity of the two genders’ coming together to make the future happen. I know you don’t think that. I know the law no longer thinks that. But I have staked my life on this truth.

The problem for me in celebrating your gay wedding, as much as I love you, is that I would be witnessing and celebrating your attempt not only to commit yourself to a relationship that keeps you from God’s plan but, worse, I would be witnessing and celebrating your attempt to hold the man you love to a vow that he will avoid God’s plan. To vow oneself to sin is one thing, to try to hold someone you love to it — that’s not something I can celebrate.

And I would be party to the idea that two men can make a marriage, which I do not believe.

On your happy day you should be surrounded by people who can honor your vow and help you keep it. I can’t do that.

“Porneia” is a word in the Bible that has been much mistranslated. But I think it means a sexual relationship that cannot by its nature become a marriage. That’s why Christ said that marriage is forever, unless it is porneia. I understand that you might well want to rupture our friendship over this, my honest view.

I choose to love you both and keep you in my life. But let us somehow against all odds find a way to love each other as we are, and not how each of us would wish the other to be.

Well, that leaves Marco Rubio who would, in fact, attend. That is good news for my Cuban fiance and his family as at least one prominent official will join us.

As for Maggie’s non attendance, we’ve just saved tons of money on the food budget.