Today’s Chicken Soup Digest: The Right Is FREAKING OUT About Marriage Equality

With the United States Supreme Court slated to begin hearing cases for and against marriage equality next week, right wingers are displaying signs of desperation and derangement.

I haven’t been posting much this week as our dog went missing on Tuesday and we still haven’t located her. This is one of the worst ways to lose a pet, BTW. But, the crazy news still flows out of crackhole bigots every day. Here’s a sampling of the extreme headlines coming out of the anti-gays:

The New Civil Rights Movement: ‘Christians Must ‘Be Prepared To Rebuild From The Ruins Of The Collapse Of Civilization’ Warns NOM Co-Founder’

NOM Co-founder Maggie Gallagher takes the victim role:

“Christianity in this country is going to enter a new phase where we are a hated minority group,” she told Dobson, who has spent decades spreading hate and lies about the LGBT community. “I think we had better be psychologically and spiritually prepared for that and be prepared to rebuild from the ruins of the collapse of civilization that we’re witnessing.”

Right Wing Watch: ‘Mike Huckabee Draws Connection Between Gay Marriage And ISIS Threat’

“We’re seeing, certainly at the national level, internally this battle on marriage, but globally what we’re seeing is that there is an assault on the Christian faith in general,” Huckabee said, before warning that ISIS will soon “physically assault” Christians in America.

Family Research Council President Tony Perkins, who hosted the call, repeated his claim that gay rights efforts in the U.S. are linked to the murder of Christians by ISIS members in the Middle East.

“If we go silent on religious freedom here at home, I think that sends a message to the terrorists and the tyrants abroad that they are free to persecute our brothers and sisters in Christ,” Perkins said.

Right Wing Watch: ‘Scott Lively: Only ‘Pitchforks And Torches’ Can Stop Gay Marriage’

Crimes against humanity defendent Scott Lively (above):

The battle today is for marriage, the core of the natural family. Every human being on this planet will be harmed if the elites are allowed to destroy it by mutation. It is no different than Monsanto destroying natural foods or seeds by mutating their DNA, or Big Pharma destroying bodies by flooding the health industry with artificial, often poisonous “remedies.” Our common paradigm in the grassroots for guiding society should be natural vs artificial across the board, including natural marriage and family: rejecting the counterfeit alternatives to the self-evident design of our ecology — and our physiology.

The natural family is the ecosystem of humanity! It must be preserved at all costs.

How? By a populist uprising! The elites need to see the angry mob — liberals and conservatives together — surging through the streets, pitchforks and torches held aloft, ready to tear down Frankenstein’s castle with their bare hands if need be. For Christians it’s Jesus and the money-changers time! Making a whip of cords like He did with His own hands, and letting these arrogant puppet masters know we mean to use it (metaphorically speaking).

Because Jeebus.

LGBTQNation: ‘No, same-sex marriage will not cause 900,000 abortions

I don’t even want to excerpt this one. If it mentioned Nazis, I would.

And that’s your chicken soup of bull shit of the day. And, how is your relationship causing abortions today?

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