Jury Duty

Laura and Crystal, 2006

Laura and Crystal, 2006

I am doing my civic duty and sitting in the San Francisco Courthouse fulfilling my jury duty.  There are about 300 of us in a room, and we are currently going through roll call.  It’s a bit like graduation — when my name was called, I felt that I should run up and get my diploma.

I came dressed in drag.  Do you think I will get excused???

I’ll never be far away

Why the title?  It happens to be the song I’m listening to at the moment.  No other significance than that.

I am sitting at SFO at the moment – awaiting a flight to Las Vegas where I will join work cohorts in the city of sin.  It is quite ironic since a fave columnist of mine, Mike Morford from the San Francisco Chronicle, wrote a great piece about Vegas in this morning’s paper.  Here’s an excerpt (you must read the entire article):

But maybe that’s just me. Because in such places I often get a bit disoriented, a bit blown away by scale, cannot help but stare at those massive theme-park hotels and widen out my mental lens and visualize the incredible quantities of resources being used every second to keep them alive and churning, all the water and energy and food, all the chemicals and cloth and concrete, the miles of cabling and electricity and the garbage and, oh yes, the sewage, the rivers of human detritus flowing from these 4,000-room monstrosities like giant faucets of refuse that never shut off.

Well said.

As I wait to create my own river of human detritus, I am waiting longer than I expected.  My flight is delayed by at least an hour.  Something about mechanical problems.  Our diarrhea-of-the-mouth gate agent said as much but I could barely hear him above the song playing on my iPod.  Plus, he went on for a good 12 minutes.  Be brief and concise, people.

The gate agent is also wearing argyle socks.  As I glance over at him, I can’t help but notice the woman next to me trying to figure out how to surf for free on the airport’s T-Mobile pay internet connection.  She doesn’t understand why she can get the T-Mobile page (inviting payment) but not her Hotmail.

Oh my.

Any cute boys on flight?  Under 60?  Not on a flight to Vegas.  That makes me the best looking dude on the plane.

And my nipples really hurt.  Something about a meeting I had with a daddy-type last evening.

That reminds me — anyone heading to Dore Alley (“Up Your Alley”) on Sunday?  I’ll make an appearance after my likely-delayed Vegas flight gets in.

One more item – I meant to do a special tribute to Estelle Getty but all my blog-eagues out there have done a perfectly good job without my additional post.  I will say that I think it is a shame that Bea, Betty, and Rue did not attend your funeral.

That’s my catch up for today.  Remember, I’ll never be far away.


What is it about old music that we keep retreating back to?  Music of our childhood or some other momentous chapter in our history?  It’s so reassuring to have a time machine in my iPod.

I am sitting on the train on the way to work totally enjoying Olivia Newton-John.  Her new live album is stupendous.  Call me a dork.  I know.  But in stressful times, there is something comforting about a ’70s pop song.  I guess that was the middle of my childhood since I went from 4 to 14 years old in the 1970s.  I remember begging for all the K-tel compilation records every Christmas — of course I wanted a poorly redone version of “All By Myself” by Eric Carmen or “Shake Your Booty” by KC and the Sunshine Band.  Oh, and don’t forget “Skyrockets in Flight…Afternoon Delight.”  I loved that song, but at 11 had no idea it referred to having sex at 3pm.  Who knew?  Even though they were “recreations” of songs so that K-tel would not have to pay singer royalties, I still loved them.  So much so that when I heard the actual versions later on, I thought THEY were fakes.

When I was 12, I remember getting my first stereo.  It had a turntable, AM/FM, 8-track, and cassette.  What else did a pre-teen need?  I was able to listen to Sister Sledge or Rex Smith (OK – tell me Rex Smith’s hit song and I’ll give you head) in the comfort of my own room while reading magazines about Richard Gere and Christoper Atkins.  Life was so insulated from everything.  Shouldn’t it always be like that?

Well, gotta go.  I need to rock out to “Suddenly.”

Checking in

Hey all.

Now that I’m blogging for a living, it is more difficult to get back to this space and write in my downtime (or maybe I’m just lazy).  Some of you noticed a post I created and then deleted but not before RSS feeds picked it up on Sunday.  Bad night.  I got robbed and had one of those shitty days when you wished you hadn’t made decisions you did.  I’m sure we all have those days.

I’m doing much better now, and am getting back on track with my life after a pretty shitty six months.  I look back on life and remember years that rocked (1986, 1990, 1998, 2001, 2006) and years that sucked (2004 and 2008 ) and realize that life is like my traffic graph in my blog stats: pretty high on Monday, flattens on Tuesday and Wednesday, and starts plummeting into the weekend.  It is these patterns that we must realize are just that — trends that in the long term are predictable.  Monday with its high traffic is always just around the corner.

By the way, I am so gay.  I cried watching a documentary about Lucille Ball on PBS last night.

Pork Boys

How we all reconnect in the oddest ways…

Above (in the middle) is an old friend from my home town in Maine, Dave.  Dave also has a blog.  His partner Daryn flanks us on the right.  We hadn’t seen each other since 1983 when about a month ago I sent an email at work to all customers of my company.

Dave saw my name and thought it sounded familiar so he checked our staff page and verified his hunch — it was, in fact, the Dan he remembered from 7th grade French class.  After about half a year at our junior high school, Dave moved about 20 miles away and I didn’t see him again until…

…Boys State, 1983.  The “prestigious” model government for over achievers brought all of us in the Class of 1984 to the University of Maine.  My friend Mike and I ran into Dave at the event, and hung out with him.  Of course, Mike and I teased Dave about how we thought he had a “perfect” French accent.

Fast forward to 2008.  My email goes out.  Dave figures out the connection and emails me.  As a result, we had been trying to get together for a month and it so happened that he invited me to a “pork off” yesterday afternoon.  I showed up not knowing what to expect after 25 years, but Dave and I hit it right off.  We found we have many commonalities, not to mention growing up in Central Maine as closeted gay boys in the early 1980s.  His friends rock, and it looks like I’ll join their “crazy croquet” league in Golden Gate Park.

It’s exactly what I needed right now.  Can’t wait until I see Dave and his gang again.

By the way, we stuffed ourselves with 3 mac and cheese entries, 3 pork main entrees, and dessert – which Dave and his partner Daryn won with home-made ice cream made with Nutella and bacon fat.  Don’t knock it until you try it.  The ice cream was fab!

I’m a paid blogger, and have your TONIC

I’ve finally made the grade.  I am a paid and compensated blogger.  This doesn’t mean that I won’t update DanNation.  It means that I am making a living serving as a blog editor at TONIC News Network.  Please visit and comment.  I would also love any of you to serve as a Guest Blogger.

I always dreamed at making a living at this and now I will.

It’s quite awesome.  Don’t be shy.  Add my new project to your blog reader.  And, come on by and hang out.

My new job is all about doing good things and I know you are all into that…