Plane ticket: $320
Gay cruise: $1,000
Gay cruise booze & spa bill: $1,732
Vacation from blogging: priceless
No, this is not a fake matte background at the Sears photo studio. It’s Atari Age, Mr. Secret, Ask Six and me on Ft. Lauderdale beach — the start of my vacation almost 12 days ago. They’ve written plenty about it, so I will not say much here except that some of these boys are great kissers. Hmmmm. I will leave the rest to your inquisitive speculation.
I also missed all of your comments and interaction and welcome you back. I’ve been reading my blogroll and trying to catch up and its amazing how much you miss with 11 days away from the net.
Now, I must share with you my thoughts on the gay cruise. My friend Donnan and I (we are dating) hopped on the ms Westerdam in Ft. Lauderdale on an R.S.V.P. cruise to the Bahamas, Key West (for Mardi Gras) and Progresso, Mexico. We had a great time on the boat, but I won’t be lining up to join another one anytime soon. I guess you can say I’ve checked it off my list.
Don’t get me wrong — it was a terrific time and Donnan and I had a great experience getting to know one another, one of the best parts for me. The onboard entertainment included Taylor Dane, great drag shows, and a wonderful cabaret performer from Chicago named Amy Armstrong. We ADORED her, and I am devoting some portion of my next podcast to promoting her. The weather was nice, we met some good people, and it is great to be in a place where you can absolutely be gay and out and open without fear of homophobia. But, it just wasn’t my piece of cake. I’ve never been a Club Med type of vacationer, preferring piecing together my own itineraries through Western Europe and elsewhere, usually consi
sting of some culture with a sprinkling of gay bars, museums, nature preserves, and other destinations that interest me.
But we had fun, as you can tell from the portrait on the right taken by the ship’s professional photographer. Now, you know what I look like from the waste down and other facts about me. Who would not enjoy sipping champagne, leaning against a deck railing, and watching the sun set on the Caribbean Sea? It’s romantic and memorable. I just felt a bit confined on the boat and will look for my next vacation to better fit my short attention span. I can’t imagine visiting a city and spending the whole time in the hotel dancing in the ball room which is how I felt about being on the ship.
We were quite depressed at one point since Donnan is a singer who performed in the off-Broadway production of “Hedwig and the Angry Inch” and brought his Hewig drag to perform in the ship’s gay talent show. We were not allowed to participate after we inadvertently missed the changed time for the audition and rehearsal. So, our good diva friend Amy Armstrong invited Donnan/Hedwig to open her cabaret and he brought the house down! It was the most memorable night of the trip for me and I was proud of my guy and his excellent performance.
While on board, we befriended this wonderful lady, an 80-year-old bisexual and former dominatrix who enjoyed the fun spirit and activities of a gay cruise versus the ordinary blue hair ones — you see her here with Hedwig at the cruise’s Mardi Gras Costume Contest. Having fucked up the 
talent show, Donnan and I figured that he should enter the costume contest but the judges selected topless twinks in long johns and bad drag queens as the finalists instead. This also stirred me up a bit. It always makes me cynical about our community when youth is awarded over creativity.
Okay, I’m bitching a bit but I feel lots better.
There were many guys on board who have been on upwards of a dozen of these cruises and really enjoy them, and that’s great. The ship was absolutely gorgeous with every amenity imaginable. We lounged in the hydropool and had massages and facials; we drank, danced, and ate well; all in all, while it was not my type of vacation we did relax. I had no access to the net, cell, or email which hasn’t happened ever before. It was nice to get away from work, bills, and blogging and just get to know someone better. In that regard, it was amazing. And, quite entertaining.
So, here’s my mixed review on gay cruises. I’m glad we went. I want to spend more time in Key West (we were only there for 10 hours); I enjoyed the rest and relaxation; I had an amazing time with Donnan; and I do like Caribbean beaches.
I may even do a gay cruise again someday. I would make sure that there were great port-of-calls (Progresso, Mexico and the prefabricated Bahamas Cay were both less than desirable – I liked Key West). I would also consider one of the windjammer cruises that RSVP offers. These ships hold fewer passengers (about 200 versus 2,000) and are more of an intimate sailing experience as you actually help run the ship. Of course, I did like drinking fruity and icy drinks. The kissing wasn’t bad, either.
