Pulling my hair out

So, I haven’t heard anything more about my potential job in San Francisco. I did exchange emails with my possible boss-to-be who wants to “talk” by the end of the week. This is the point in any job interview process where I start to get antzy about not hearing anything. You see, I have never been a strong believer in “no news is good news.” In fact, I always think it is an ominous sign. I’ve felt depressed all day but we’re all allowed days like today once in a while, aren’t we. I get the feeling that they offered the job to someone else and are waiting to hear a response – maybe I’m #2? The thing that I really need to deal with is the fact that I’ve gotten every job for which I’ve ever applied. And, I’ve never been fired. Hopefully I won’t throw myself into a rattlesnake-infested mesa if this doesn’t happen.

If I don’t get the job, my plans still become drastically altered. I plan to sell the house in March regardless of leaving town or not; it is just too expensive given my non-profit salary and single status. If I stay a bit longer, I also want to live close to downtown and work – it makes things like taking care of Louie easier and will lower my rent. Teddy and I would probably rent downtown for a bit until I determine where I go next. It would make a big difference to walk to my destinations, especially when alcohol is involved.

Maybe I’m just being gloomy for no reason. I am still ecstatic about my job here, and I now have gay friends through blogging that I was looking for in a move in the first place. I guess all that money I’ll save not paying my mortgage will go to traveling to meet new friends. That won’t be so bad.

I was bored this evening so I redesigned my blog a bit. I like the new colors better, and the redesign occupied my fragile mind a bit.

I do have Valentine’s Day to look forward to – I will likely eat my Marie Callendar’s dinner alone while I watch TV.

Now I’m about ready to cry…!

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About DanNation
Writer, gay blogger, tech addict and news junkie, DanNation grew up in Maine and resides in San Francisco with husband Rich and canines Louie, Puki and Sydney. He is in Year 7 of writing his DanNation blog. Email: dannationblog@gmail.com.
  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/10470020 MrSecret

    Chin up, buckaroo. Even if this job doesn’t pan out, you still got your dignity and a spiffy Plantronics headset to do podcasts with!

    I still got my fingers and toes crossed for you… And yeah, Valentine’s Day. Fuckin’ fuckity fuck. Boo.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/6137561 Scotty

    Wow…that is depressing. I went through the same in January. Never NOT got a job I didn’t want and the past year I have been turned down for 3! ehh…getting to be old hat now. IT could be a lot of reasons but I wouldn’t fret JUST yet!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/9910967 Sorted Lives

    Valentine’s Day blows anyways — it’s nothing more than a Hallmark holiday anyways… Everyone is allowed a day to feel meloncoly!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/6132770 Damien Scott

    I am back on the job hunt in preparation for a move to rural Wisconsin — ever looked for a job in rural Wisconsin? We had frist considered moving to Santa Fe when my Partner retired — we both love it and my Partner’s boys go to school at St. John’s — but the cost of housing! Gimme a break.

    Anyway, good luck. I am supposed to hear this week from an agent about getting a book published. Every date without mail means no rejection slip and a small reprieve. Every day without mail means no acceptance and another night to fret.

    Valentine’s Day is so bogus. Knowing that doesn’t make it go away, though, does it?

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/2049963 Adam

    Don’t cry!! I always say that the squeky wheel gets te grease. If you wrote the thank you letter for the interview and did the follow up call to express your renewed interest in the position after the interview you should be golden.

    I know how it is though…the waiting sucks so bad. try not to think about it too much and in a little over a week we’ll be having a blast in the arid locale of phx!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/11074211 Nathan

    Hey buddy boy

    Keep on smilin’. You know everything happens for a reason.

    Waiting drives me crazy too. I have no patience sometimes. I understand what you’re going through.

    You’re still communicating with your future boss, so I think that’s good. Think positive thoughts and positive things will happen. A huge chunk of our lives is based solely on our perspective.

    We are just shells of people, living our lives, doing our jobs. It is our personal perspective that defines whether things are going good or bad for us. So anticipate positive changes in your living situation, and I’m sure they will appear one way or another.

    Nice changes to the blog, btw.

    xoxoxo
    Nathan

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/17743588 Kel de Texas

    Remember: If it’s meant to be, it’ll happen.

    Have faith in yourself. :)

    Ps. I’m going through the SAME thing!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/937657 Spider

    Love the new colors and the changes… remember, Valentines Day is nothing more than an invented holiday by the card companies – to give the hetro’s something to do when there is snow on the ground… as for the job – it will work out for the best – and I bet YOU ARE the best man for the job!

    Thinking about you sport!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/12231587 Kiss My Mike

    It can be frustrating not to get things the way we want them. But sometimes, the frustration part is due to having high expectations.

    Cheer up. You did your best in your interviews. If this opportunity doesn’t work out, then there’s a hundred others that’ll open up for you.

    ~Mike

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/4642605 God of Biscuits

    Good luck on the job news…

    I have lived in San Francisco for going on 13 years now. I love it here. I’m still amazed that I get to live here.

    *When* you get the job, let me know if you need any info on [the other?] SF. Happy to help.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/4205984 MargOH! Channing

    Darling Dan,

    I hope you get your job and move to the great city of San Francisco. I once lost my heart and 75 bucks to a pack of gay male strippers.

    If for some reason you don’t get the job do as I did when I lost the role as Joan Crawford for “Mommie Dearest”.

    I told the director and Faye Dunaway to go fuck themselves and they did….. I never would have played Joan so over the top, yikes.

    Kisses, MargOH!