My living room somewhat decorated for the holidays. My digital camera sucks and maybe Santa will bring a new one?!?
So, I get a particular party invitation every year. In fact, every year since 1997. This guy I used to work with in my dot.com past sends this email out once or twice a year for his “parties.” I haven’t spoken to him since mid-2000 (not because we had a fight or anything, but because he left the company I worked for). This invitation frightens me, and I have never attended. The host (names have been changed here to protect the innocent) weighs over 400 lbs, and the thought of hottubbing with him in a “clothing-optional” hot tub gives me the heebie-jeebies. I sat next to him when we went to see the first “Star Wars” film in the late ’90s. I remember that he spilled out over his seat and our bodies touched in strange locations. He also smelled bad. We never really hit it off as friends, either. And he still sends me these for every party he hosts. Of course, I will remind you that I haven’t lived in California since 2001.
I know – yell at me for being obese-insenstive. I could care less about people’s weight, though. I’m sorry if I made it seem the point. Hell, look at my own fluctuations over the years (low: 162 lbs; high: 198 lbs; now: 172 lbs) I guess what I’m saying is that if you don’t have contact and/or respond to communications from people for over 5 years, don’t you drop them off the invite list?
I still get the shivers when I see this in my inbox.
Subject: Not-Quite-New-Year’s-Eve Party at XXXX’s, FRIDAY 30 Dec 05, 6pm
Continuing my tradition of seldom throwing a New Year’s Eve party actually _on_ New Year’s Eve, I’ve decided to throw this year’s party on the night BEFORE New Year’s Eve: FRIDAY, 30 Dec 05, 6pm til whenever…
Details (yes, if you’ve ever gotten one of my party invitations before, you’ve seen all this before! :
EAT: I’ll provide basic munchies, and I trust that some
folks will bring interesting things to share or prepare
(the house has a first class kitchen, far in excess of my
meager talents, if you want to bring anything and prepare
it here). And the big gas barbecue grill will be available
on the back patio…
DRINK: choose from a selection of beverages, both with and
without alcohol, or bring something interesting to share.
BE MERRY: Enjoy a relaxing evening with a bunch of interesting
folks, some of whom you’ll already know, and some of whom you
haven’t yet met. Amuse yourselves with the billiards table,
dart board, and hot tub (bathing suits are optional, but it would definitely be a good idea to bring a towel).
Feel free to bring friends, spouses, significant others, and so forth; interesting new people to meet are always welcome. If you want to pass the invitation along to somebody else, but you won’t be arriving with them, please check with me first. Also, please beware that, while kids are welcome, my house is nowhere near child-safe, so you’ll need to keep a close eye on them. There are no pets here to tickle the allergies of those of you so afflicted.
There’s no need for you to bring anything but yourselves; plenty of food and drink will be provided. However, if you want to bring something special to share, please do! RSVPs are appreciated (so that I know how much food and drink to procure), but not essential; don’t let lack of an RSVP keep you from joining us!
My house is at XXXXXXX, just off XXXXXX, in downtown
Hope to see you here!